Hello my name is Titilope Omitogun and I am not popular. I'd like to think my slightly intimidating name has nothing to do with it, but that may not be the case. You can't be popular with a name like Titilope. You just can't. It's not possible. Popular people tend not to be intelligent (general observation), and only intelligent people are able to properly decipher how my name is pronounced 'Tee-Tee-Lo-Pay'. That's one reason to not be popular; it means you're not stupid:
- Popular people are stupid. If you're popular and you're reading this; please don't take offence, but knowing how stupid you are, you probably will take offence. Yes. It's an unspoken fact. Popular people are stupid. If popular people were intelligent, well then let's just say; the music charts wouldn't be such torture to listen to.
- Popular people die earlier. Now, before you think this is just me being completely bitter and bias because you know... I'm not popular. It's not, popular people do die younger. Well, I think they do anyway. Let me get you into the mind of a popular guy named... I don't know... Bradley.
"It's a Saturday, and I have so many parties to go to. Oh look, it's a text from one of my numerous ex-girlfriends. It reads 'Hey sexy. Come to mine. Huge party on' <- Well. I'd be an idiot to miss a huge party! I must go. I'll just spend a few hours getting ready before proceeding to get drunk senseless at this huge party... Oh my! Is that the time? I'm going to be late. Oh another text. It reads 'Bradley, where are you? The party is dead without you' <- I must rush to this party and watch as all the females through themselves at me. I arrive. 'BRADLEY. BRADLEY. LET'S GO ON A JOY RIDE'. Well okay! I'm only 16, it's not like I'm gonna die or anything is it?. WAAAY. ON A HIGHWAY TO HELL. OH. I'M SO HARDCORE. DRIVING WHILE DRUNK. AHHHHHHHH. *CRASH* I died? (In case it wasn't clear. He died)"
As you can see from the mind of this very unfortunate popular young man. Popular people do die earlier.
- Popular people 9/10 times always end up working in McDonalds. They have this 'I'M SO POPULAR. I DON'T NEED TO LEARN' idea engraved into their brain. However, we all know even popular people need to learn, well I say all, but clearly the popular people don't. Which would evidently explain why they always end up having to spend the rest of their life serving chips, their only form of pleasure being the fact that they can spit into the chips of patronising people like me.
- Popular people can't spell. I don't think I need to justify this. It is a well known fact. 'I luff yooh so much babieeeee. nvr break up wit me.' <- Of course he breaks up with her, after impregnating her and contracting 5 different types of STDs.
- Popular people always grow up to be reeeeallly unattractive. A prime example of this, is a boy that used to go to my primary school. I will admit, that he was a bit of all right back when he was 11 and couldn't spell 'because'; but now. Jesus wow. He is very unattractive. I know. I know. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and all that, however, I can almost guarantee that you will not find this boy attractive.
Nerdy girls ftw
ReplyDeletebtw where is your name from? like, is it a family name?
It's Nigerian. Everyone tells me it's a pretty name. They're lying to me.
ReplyDeleteYeah... It's a Nigerian name, of the Yoruba tribe. There's variations in the pronunciation of it. I think Tee-tee-lo-pay sounds best though!
I am the mom of two teenage boys. They have good friends, but I don't think they would be considered "popular." I'm relieved because I think there are a lot more pressures placed on popular kids, who have to keep trying so hard to be cool and to stay popular.
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean. But not being popular can have it's burdens too. 'Unpopular' kids often feel like they're not good enough, and I don't know, I guess they often try to get into the popular crowd. Which isn't really a good thing.
ReplyDeleteI try not to get too wrapped up in such things though, I think that popularity at high school is often down to very superficial things and doesn't really help you much in the future.
Thanks for the comment though. Much appreciated.
Not all Popular people are stupid. I was popular based on just staying the way I was naturally and I had AP classes and Honors. You can be popular and not stupid. Just simply make an excuse to not go to any party so then no one can influence you to do bad things. As long as you keep your head on straight.
ReplyDeleteThe key word on was "tend", implying that not ALL popular people stupid.
ReplyDeleteOf course, I agree with you.
But I was being extremely hyperbolic for the sake of humour.